Repentance: A wonderful thing

Okay, so most of you who read my blog are members of the Church, but for those who aren't, indulge me in sharing a story of the Prophet Joseph Smith Jr. One day he went to work on translating the Book of Mormon, a process by which he needed to be in tune with the Spirit. He went into the room, and didn't say a word. He couldn't do it. He walked out of the room, went to his wife, and asked her forgiveness for a disagreement they just had had. After reconciling with his wife, the Prophet Joseph was able to again return to the work of translating. What an amazing story, right? Well, I had my taste of it tonight.
I was about to read the scriptures when I was really troubled by something that had happened between my Mom and I earlier. I walked into my bathroom and I found one of my letters opened and out on the counter. It was a bill. And to be honest, it was past due, although I should not have been charged because I ended my service. Anyways, I got upset because my Mom had opened my mail (my Dad never opens the mail, so I knew it was my Mom). I walked over to her and asked her why she opened it. She said because the envelope had "final notice" written on the envelope. I asked her to never open my mail again. She looked flustered and upset, but she turned away and said okay, and so I walked back to my room.
Now, as I am trying to read the scriptures, I realize that I need to do something for my Mom to let her know that I forgive her for opening my letter and to let her know that I love her. So I made a card for her out of construction paper (I know, so elementary school, right?). I put it on her chair so she could find it there when she was done with the computer. I go over to her and give her a kiss and a hug. She then asks if I had read her email to me. I said no, and so she pulled it up. Turns out she didn't notice who the letter was addressed to until after she had opened the letter. Now I feel like dirt! I felt so bad. Anyways, she asked me to forgive her. So I went and grabbed the card I made for her, and she laughed at the fact it was made out of construction paper and read the card. We both were smiling and laughing and felt a weight lifted. What a wonderful feeling.
I just thought I would share that with all of you. It's one of those sweet experiences that are worth more than all the money in the world.
Oh, and now I can read the scriptures! :)
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Elizabeth has a job interview Monday in AZ. Pray for me! Noon AZ time. I applied for a receptionist position. Right now I just need a job, so that is what I am going for.
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Oh, and Mr. I want to hang out with you and possibly date you that spread that rumor about him and me didn't show up to FHE, so I wasn't able to talk to him. I doubt I will really get a chance to see him before I leave anyways. Won't be here this Sunday, the Sunday after that is stake conference, and won't be at FHE next Monday. At least, it is very likely that I won't be there. Since Emily and I will be leaving after my interview to come back, we will probably get into town at around 9:00pm. Sucks, cause that is Emily's birthday. BUT I am going to make it up to her. At least she gets to be in AZ for the weekend and gets to hang with Barron! She is happy about that, I know. :)

Sunday

Okay, ready for a twist? So after Church at break the fast, the guy that Warren said he had heard the rumor about ran into me. I looked offended but quickly broke into a smile and jokingly told him I heard a rumor that he and I were dating. He said that he started it, and that he wouldn't mind hanging out with me. I gave him the most surprised look I have and asked him if he was being serious. He said downright serious. Ha! He even tried to talk me into staying. He asked what I thought about it, and I said I would get back to him. I wasn't about to say anything to him that EVERYONE else might hear. I will let him down. We can be friends, but I am not in the market for anything more than that.
Just thought I would share that. :) Oh, and Warren called me and asked me if we were still friends. He asked whether we should stop talking. I was about to go on a walk, so I told him I would have to get back to him, but I really think we should stop talking completely. That way I don't go on this roller coaster anymore. So, here goes nothing.
Have a wonderful Sabbath everyone!

okay, an update

Alrighty folks, Elizabeth is officially moving to AZ. I start moving next weekend. I leave Friday night June 8th, with rental car, pack up whatever I can fit into the rental, oh, and my sister (yay!) and put it all into my room in AZ. Very exciting! I am VERY happy to be doing this. I will also get to see Becky before she leaves and moves away to Virginia (VERY sad she will be so far away, but VERY happy for her nonetheless). My sister and I will come back Monday sometime, hopefully before FHE so my sister will be here for it. Plus, that is her birthday. Kinda sucks that we are traveling on that day, but we will be in AZ so it will be a treat for her too. I think she is excited.
One of my best friends is pregnant! I become an aunt again!!! YAY!!!! I hope she has a good and healthy pregnancy. So far so good. And I get to be around this time for the whole spiel. I am so excited. And I will get to play with my 'niece', her first born, and she will be able to remember me now!
So Warren calls me today and says "I heard a rumor that you were dating so and so." This guy I am supposedly dating is one of his good friends and...yeah. SO not my type. I was actually offended that Warren even thought there was any justification for the rumor. He even asked why anyone would say that I was dating him. I have maybe had a good one on one conversation once within the last two weeks with this guy. Can I just say I can't wait to get out of here? I hate this. HATE IT!! I have luckily been very busy the last few days, so I just haven't been available to talk with him at all. I am just glad I have a real excuse to not talk with him. I still very much care about him, and I hope that one day he and I can be friends, but right now...I just can't. Too much hurt and pain.
Can I just say how wonderful it is to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints? I love it. The Church is so true! You know, if not for my calling and faith and scripture reading and supplemental reading from Church authors...and the programs that the Church provides, I don't know if I would be doing this well. Really, the Church is such a wonderful thing. I have really been blessed.
Thank you for the private notes and the comments people have sent me, I appreciate it. I don't know what I would do without my friends either!!! :)

...the pain

My Mom and I started watching a movie tonight, and we both were getting tired, so we went to bed. As I was brushing my teeth, I suddenly realized that the noise I was hearing wasn't the TV because we had just turned it off, but my Dad. He was yelling at my Mom. It was pretty hard, I am sure she is back there crying or really upset and feeling horrible now. Gosh, that is the last thing I ever want, is to have a husband that yells like that. It makes me feel horrible. My poor Mommy, she is such a sweet person. My Dad I think has a much worse problem than I do. I believe I have mentioned this before, but I have manic depression, which is basically bipolar disorder. I have caught it early, which is really good, because with time it gets worse. It is a genetic thing, so very likely I inherited it from my Dad. He will have times when he is incredibly happy, and then times when he is very unhappy and depressed...and angry. It hurts so much. I know he loves my Mom and I, but it still hurts. I wish he would go to see a doctor and counselor about it. I don't know if he even realizes that it is such a problem.
Alright, just needed to write a bit about this. Thanks for listening!

A lazy lazy day

For the first time in who knows how long, I had the opportunity to sleep in. It was fabulous! Again, it was FABULOUS!!! I slept for 11 hours, interupted for a very short time by my parents waking me up for family prayer. It's strange, I haven't had family prayer in a long time, and to suddenly come back to it...gosh I hope I never have to have family prayer at 6:00am! But I will do whatever I need to. It is nice to have it again at the very least.
I cleaned the temple last night. For a while I thought I was going to be the only one from my branch who came to help, but then this guy (who I have to be honest, I was kinda hoping would come, but really had no reason to come) showed up right as we were about to get started. I can't really say why I hoped he would, because I really don't want to date anyone right now. I still love Warren, and I just can't stop loving him yet. But this guy just stands out to me for some reason. YES, he is tall. But what really got me is that he is finished with his second year of his graduate degree. THAT is interesting. So anyways, I didn't really get to talk with him much. As I was in one of the endowment rooms, I was thinking, now wouldn't it be nice if he was going to Arizona State. Guess what?! He is! I couldn't believe it! I told him that I was moving out to AZ this summer. He said I was crazy, that this is the time to get away from AZ. I don't really mind the heat all that much. Being that I delivered pizza for three summers in it, AND I lived in the south for three years, I will take an AZ summer any day. Anyways, that was about all that happened.
Amber is doing an internship in AZ for a good part of the summer. I offered her a place to stay. So I now have a goal date for when to be out in AZ. I need to be there by June 25th. So by golly, I will be there. So, um, I need a job. :) Still looking. Going to be sending in applications and resume's sometime this week and making some phone calls.
Well, good night folks. Pleasant dreams!

Working and...confused

Well, I have worked at about 6 different places so far. I mostly have been the answer the phone person, but I have also been a notetaker. I like it a lot. I get the chance to be at a number of different places, and I am learning how to be a REALLY flexible receptionist. I am also learning how to use a number of different computer programs and a number of different styles of phones.
Today I am working for Chandler Hill Partners, which is a marketing company who helps people find jobs. I like it here, they have a really nice office, on the top floor of a really nice building, and the people that I am working for are pretty fun to work with. Too bad they can't market me! :) That would make my life so much easier. As it turns out, the person looking for the job pays for the service. Backwards from who I work for, where the company looking for an employee pays for the service.
I have friends! I finally was able to talk to most of my good friends the last few days. Julie, Amber, Franchesca, Becky. Nichee I text pretty much everyday, but I will also mention her for good measure.
You know what sucks? The last two weeks I have been getting responses to an email I sent out a couple of months ago asking for addresses for wedding invitations. The nice thing is that I am getting in touch with people who I haven't talked to for a VERY long time. Such as Tom! He emailed me recently. It was fabulous to hear from him. He and I were pretty good friends during college, but then he got married (the punk!) and I moved so we pretty much stopped talking then. It was so good to hear from him. I can't believe it, he is going to grad school! So happy for him.
Alright, why is muah confused? Well, let me tell you! So I had this dream the other night. I am not going to tell the internet world my dream, but basically Warren and I got back together. So the next day he calls...just to talk. Then two days later he calls again...the day he is leaving...and I miss his call in the morning. He says that he wishes me well with everything in his message. I thought he had already left, and I was in the worst of all moods that day, so I wasn't about to call him right back because it wouldn't have done either of us any favors. So he calls again that afternoon, and I answer it then. He asks me where I am, I tell him I am at home, and he tells me he is still in the area, but he is on his way out. He actually called that morning to see if he can come and say goodbye. Now, we already said our goodbyes on Sunday, so I had no reason to think that he wanted to see me. So then we talk for forever, almost the way we used to before things started going downhill. It was nice. And he tells me that he isn't mad anymore and that he is sorry for the fact that he ever was. Isn't that nice? He is being all nice and sweet, and he is leaving. :) Oh well. BTW, for those that aren't informed...he is currently in Memphis working for the summer.
ALTHOUGH...he may be coming back here because he is up for a HUGE commercial being shot here in NM for Giant...he would be the spokesperson for GIANT!!! As in the gasoline company!!! That is HUGE. Like, he wouldn't have to work for forever with a gig like that. So, they seem to be really interested, but unless they are for sure going to use him, he won't be coming back out here, which is totally understandable. Oh, I hope he gets it though. I am not being selfish with this either, because I probably wouldn't get to see him anyways, but this would be so wonderful for him. I really hope he gets it.
So anyways...I don't know why he is being all nice and stuff. I don't know if he is wondering if...well...nothing will happen for a long time even if something were to ever happen again between the two of us.
Alright people, Elizabeth needs a job! In AZ. That will pay enough that I can buy myself a car! Any ideas? I have found a few opportunities on the internet, but I am still open to suggestions! :)

broken

We broke up. I did it. I have tried to go back to him, but he...well, it's complicated. So he will go his way and I will go mine. Oh, but it hurts so much! So much. You know what I hate though? The fact that he seems to have moved on so quickly and easily. That really does bother me. When I am having the time of my life trying to get over him. Oh well. I guess that is life. Oh, I miss him so. You know, that feeling, when your heart gets broken. It really feels broken. It hurts so much.

I went to Alabama this last week, set up all the utilities so that they will turn off at the end of May at my house out there, went down to the school, and hung out with a bunch of my friends out there. I passed my comprehensive examinations, and am SO happy about that! :) I will actually be able to graduate! YAY!! :)

I am going to AZ this week for my cousin Kent's wedding. I am so happy for him! I will be glad to be with friends and family. I get to hang out with Franchesca, which will be great. We will be treating each other to dinner, or lunch or something. It will be fabulous, whatever we do.

That's all from me. Love to all of you!